“I love you” The shorter sentence is, the more power it holds!
It provides a new meaning to your relationship. It changes your relationship from a casual thing to something more profound.
You can call saying “I love you” a relationship milestone. When you have found that one person you have been waiting for, it is just a matter of time. You want to lay down your true feelings in front of your partner, but something is holding you back.
Most guys like short girls but are often unsure about confessing their true feelings. They think:
Is it the right time to say it? Should I say it first or wait for the other one? Would my feelings be accepted? Should I even say it?
These thoughts might claw at your mind, confusing you. If you are confused about the timeline of your relationship, here are a few suggestions. Read on to know!
How Long Should You Wait Before Saying I Love You?
You might be bursting with feelings when you are around that person, on the verge of slipping those three words out of your mind. But you stop yourself, wondering if it is the right time.
People take days, weeks, months, to even years before confessing this feeling. Some people consider saying I love you as sealing the stamp, so they take their time saying the words.
“Some people, however, use the term ‘love’ rather loosely; in this case, saying ‘I love you can feel appropriate in the first few weeks or months.” Said clinical psychologist Carla Marie Manly, Ph.D.
According to one survey, men take only 88 days to tell their partner they love them, compared to a woman’s languorous 134. Moreover, 39 percent of men say ‘I love you within the first month of seeing someone, compared to 23 percent of women.
There is no right time to say I love you – yet every time is right. If you are the one saying it, we suggest you confirm your feelings thoroughly before freeing the bird (saying it).
How Soon is Too Soon, by the Way?
If you are just a week or two into knowing someone and already saying I love you or proposing to them, we would say it is a bit early. If you don’t know someone that much, you might be the confusing attraction to love.
Sometimes what we feel as love is just attraction or infatuation. Infatuation is a more surface-level feeling of interest towards someone, while love is something deeper. It is when you bond intimately with your emotions, all intertwined.
However, not all cases are the same. And love can happen in a matter of days and weeks.
As Lexx Brown-James, Ph.D., LMFT, a licensed couple therapist, concludes,
It’s more about the nature of the time spent together than the amount of time spent together
That being said, you are the only person who can decide for yourself when to say I love you. Make sure you are honest and mentally and emotionally ready to take the next step.
How Do You Know “When to Say I Love You”?
The time taken by the people to drop the L-bomb varies. You can say it as soon as you feel it- no problem! But it is better to confirm your feelings before letting someone in on them. There is no one-size-fits-all solution, but here are a few signs you might be too deep in the shit.
- You love them – not just their happy, fun, and loving side but also their not-so-likable side. You love them even when they are frustrated, irritated, or not at their best
- You don’t just enjoy hanging out with them but sharing responsibilities. It is still fun to do groceries together with your girl, clean the house, or feed the dog
- You think of them while making plans. You also want them to be included in your plans
- You support them wholeheartedly. Their dreams, ideas, or wild fantasies, whatever it is! Even if you don’t understand the level of their obsession with anything, you support them every thick and thin
- You have seen their positive response whenever you confess to them that you like them or feel close to them
- You noticed their body language, and you have seen that they also are inclined toward you
- You respect them as a person, their family, and friends. You treasure everything related to them
- You are planning a future together, even if it is just in your head
What if They Don’t Love You Back?
Rejections can be hurtful. It breaks your personality, makes you sad, and may end your belief in love and affection. But it is not a mature response. It will leave you scarred.
You can’t make anyone fall in love with you anyway. So it is better to cope with the rejection. Instead of clinging to the person, separate your ways with grace. Be confident in your personality and make peace with reality.
One thing that people do after a rejection is to blame the person. It is not a healthy reaction. Do not play a blame game and let the traumatized past not affect your present and potential future ahead of you. Grief the loss for a while and grow out of it, considering it a painful experience. Learn to form it and move on.
The Bottom Line!
It is a delightful feeling to feel someone close and precious to you. Sometimes you will receive the love in return, and sometimes it will go the other way. When you confess your real feeling to someone, be ready for everything. Make yourself strong and be ready for every scenario as you are making yourself vulnerable to them. Things can go either way.
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage– Lao Tzu